Are you Building Walls only to Have them Knocked Down? ~ Mom Blog ~

~ my personal synopsis of a recent sermon~

Do you ever see people that have what you want?

Do you look at them and wonder, "How can I get that?"

You know what I'm talking about.... you see some people and you think they are simply blessed beyond belief. You start to desire what they have.

You want to build a successful business just like they have.
You want your marriage to be happy just like theirs.
You want the funds in your bank account to runnith over exactly like theirs.
You want deep faith to lead your life just as it leads theirs.
And, you want your family to have close bonds just like you witness in theirs.

So, what's the difference?

Why do they seem to have it all when your walls are crumbling down? Do you find yourself asking, "Why can't I get ahead in these areas of my life?"

Maybe your marriage is in turmoil.... maybe it's even your third marriage that is falling apart.
Maybe your bank account is overdrawn.
Maybe your family doesn't find the time to be a family.
Maybe your business is filing bankruptcy.
Maybe you just don't have the faith.

For these areas of your life to grow, it takes sweat.  It also takes consistency. And that means it's not going to be easy. 

Let's just focus on marriage, and then you can apply this metaphor to the rest of your life.

The blocks on the left represent a man who is devoted to his wife.  He is there for her and wants to see their relationship grow.  The blocks on the right also represent a man who is devoted to his wife.  He is there for her and wants to see their relationship grow.

A year passes. The man on the left continues to be devoted to his wife.  He starts to put sweat equity into the marriage. He asks her how she is doing on a daily basis. He pours her coffee.  He asks her out for date nights. He prays for her and their marriage.  The man on the right expects that his marriage will work, but there is no consistency in his actions and he is not willing to sweat. He is sometimes late for dinner and doesn't call.  He sometimes forgets to greet his wife when he comes home from work. He doesn't ask her directly how her day went but does talk about how hard his was. His wall are destined to start to crumble.


2 years later


The man on left, his marriage is growing. He has something to show for his sweat.  The man on the right, his marriage is falling apart. He will have to work hard, put things in overdrive, to build his walls back up if he wants his relationship to work.



3 years later



The man on the left now has a firm foundation for his marriage.  He will continue to devote the time, energy, and be consistent in his actions in order to build this lasting relationship.  The man on the right has backtracked.  He now has to recover from all his inconsistencies and try to make things work. He can build the walls again, but keep in mind, he is still on the first floor.



4 years later

 It's a vicious cycle of inconsistencies for the man on the right.

five years later

 Which set of blocks represents you?  Are you the blocks on the right, and you find yourself  having to rebuild everything from relationships to your bank account to your faith just because you are not willing to work at it? or maybe you have to work extra hard to make up for the lost effort. Is it time to break the cycle of inconsistencies in your life? After 5 years, the man on the left has something to show for his hard work. The man on the right builds his walls only to have them fall down... time after time.

You might have even noticed that the man on the right came close to building five floors himself. The problem was, his inconsistencies kept those floors from growing. You have a choice, you can work hard and have one floor, or you can work hard and build a high-rise. The high-rise gets you closer to the sky.  The high-rise is what you get after many years of sweat equity.

So, what is the answer? 

prayer, sweat, consistency

Apply those to your life and you will build your business, your finances, your family, your marriage, and your faith.

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Family Dinners at Home ~ Mom Blog ~

It is sort of sad when the question is, "Where are we going to eat" and not "What are we going to eat?"

Deciding to stay home this year with Hudson meant cutting back in some areas. So, in order to help pinch  pennies, we try our best to eat at home as much as we can.  We have always been a family that loves to eat out. Most of the time it has been for convenience as we hop from one ball park to another, but we also just enjoy the..."Where are we going to eat tonight?"..... or so we thought!  Okay, we do like to eat out, but as time has passed, and we have done it less and less, we have grown to enjoy eating at our own dinner table more and more.  I might add that it's not just the adults that feel this way, it's the kids.

Staying at home meant I needed to take a close look at where our money was going, breaking down credit card statements, bills, etc.  We always pay our credit cards off monthly, and typically use them simply for convenience.  In this case, the use of the credit cards made it nice to be able to look back and see where our money was going each month.  RUDE awakening!!  Way too much money was going to eating out.  Honestly, I never really looked at the amount we were spending on eating out.  After all, we had the money, so I would just pay the bill and move on.  But after a close examination, the restaurant portion of the bill looked something like this:  Zaxby's, Chick-fil-a, Moe's, Chick-fil-a, Shane's, Chick-fil-a, Chili's, blah, blah, blah.... basically, just repetition of restaurant after restaurant day after day.

After further examination, I started to think about what the kids were ordering at these restaurants.  Basically they always order the same 2-3 items no matter where we eat, most frequently being chicken tenders and french fries......not so healthy and no variety!

My dinner table

After getting into the routine of eating at home over a several month period, Madison, my thirteen year old daughter, has made the comment on many occasions that she enjoys eating at home.  In the beginning, out of pure habit, Gibson would say something like, "Where are we going to eat?" and I would say, "Remember, we are going to try to eat at home more."  He has had a slight adjustment since he does love his french fries, but he has actually grown to love this time around the table, as well.  As a couple of months have passed, eating at home is the expected place to have our meals, with a dining out experience occurring about once a week.  Visiting restaurants has sort of become something special to them. They appreciate it, and it makes it more fun for the family. 



 With eating at the family dinner table comes many positives.  There is more play time, as the kids can play while I cook.  There is more variety in the foods they eat, not just the chicken fingers and fries.  Lots of money is saved. The kids learn clean up responsibilities by helping after dinner. One of my favorites is that the kids tend to engage in conversation more.  Think about it. You don't have all of the other people, noises, distractions, etc. that you do in restaurants.  It is a more personal experience at home, and therefore the kids would naturally be more inclined to engage themselves in conversations. 

We, as a family, made this decision for financial reasons, but I would encourage you to do the same even if money is not a factor.  I think you will find that your kids will start to enjoy it even before you do, and that in itself should make it worthwhile.

In order to help with some conversation starters at the dinner table, I have given you some ideas. Enjoy!

• Tell me your favorite thing about today. 
• Tell me something that happened today that you thought was sad. 
• How did you make someone happy today? 
• Tell me something funny your teacher said. How do you think teachers can make learning more fun? 
• What kinds of creative lessons did your teachers do in school today? 
• What did you decide to eat for lunch? If you could design school lunches, what would you serve? 
• You have one minute to tell me as much as you can remember about today.
• What are some fun things you think we can do as a family? 
• What is your favorite subject in school right now? Least favorite? Why? 
• Have you met any new friends in school? Names? Interests? 
• Who do you sit by at school? How is that working for you? 
• Do you ever see kids do things that you think are inappropriate? How do you think they should have handled the situation?
• If you won the lottery, what would you do with the money? 
• Tell me 5 words to describe your day. Then have your kid elaborate on them.  
• Have you seen any cool toys/ inventions on TV lately? If so, what?

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